How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
