And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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