i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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