i jhust puked up my retainher.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Randomize
