if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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