I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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