Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
