Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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