Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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