Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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