what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
