So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
