Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
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