i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
