So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
