Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
