Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Randomize
