So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
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