singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
