I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
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