hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
