The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
