oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize