I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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