Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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