I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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