did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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