i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
