Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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