remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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