i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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