I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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