Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
