I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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