so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
it's like iHOP with fire
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
