lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
