I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
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