when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
