My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
people are starting to question the shark bite story
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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