omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
how drunk are you?
Several
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
