And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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