It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize