After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize