Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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