so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
