Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
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