Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
