I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
