I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
its not stalking. its research.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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