This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize