She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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