Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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