i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
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